Join Mettle Health founder and counselor BJ Miller, MD and Mettle Health counselor Tom Grothe, NP for a discussion on living with multiple losses.
The longer we live, the fuller our life; but the more we lose. Being in the world requires commitment and passion, but inevitably leads to losses. As we age these losses add up; the death of a spouse or best friend, a beloved pet dying, personally experiencing aging and increased disability, and facing one's own chronic, or even terminal illness, are examples of multiple losses. Bereavement theory tells us to sequentially process loss, but when the losses are multiple and unending that becomes very difficult. Are there other ways to process our losses and grow from them? Multiple personal losses often cause the survivor to ask what the purpose of their life is. In addition to our bereft sadness and pain, could we process our grief by adding focus to our elevating emotions? Joy, inspiration and hope might provide different ways to understand our losses and find comfort in our bereavement. Even in our deepest despair are there are quiet joys we can access?
All online discussions begins with a basic overview before opening up to the group for Q&A and conversation. This session should feel as supportive as it does educational, so bring your questions and comments, or feel free to just listen. Together, we’ll explore real life examples and address your questions.
Discussions are held online and once registered, you will receive a link via email to join on video or by phone.
If you can't make it to the live session you will receive a recording.
Dr. BJ Miller is a longtime hospice and palliative medicine physician and educator. He’s been on faculty at his alma mater, UCSF, since 2007 and has worked in all settings of care: hospital, clinic, residential facility, and home. Led by his own experiences as a patient, BJ advocates for the roles of our senses, community and presence in designing a better ending. He speaks nationally, and internationally, on the topics of death, dying, palliative care and the intersection of healthcare with design.
His 2015 TED Talk: “Not Whether, But How”, has been viewed over 11 million times and his work has also been the subject of multiple interviews and podcasts, including Oprah Winfrey, PBS, The New York Times, The California Sunday Magazine, GOOP, Krista Tippett, Tim Ferriss and the TED Radio Hour. His book, A Beginner’s Guide to the End, was co-authored with Shoshana Berger and published in 2019.
Tom Grothe is a Nurse Practitioner and psychotherapist who has provided primary, palliative and hospice care for over 40 years. He is a Marriage Family Therapist (inactive) and had a psychotherapy practice focusing on multiple losses and quality of life. Tom worked as a hospice nurse early in the movement and was the Charge Nurse of the world’s first AIDS and cancer in-patient hospice. His symptom-management approach to disease progression empowers patients and families to promote and maximize quality of life in accordance with their values and wishes and make a plan of care that honors those wishes. Tom is the author of “Fallen Sparrows” and lives in San Francisco with his husband and their two rescue cats. He practices yoga daily and sings in a semiprofessional choir.